Catholic Wedding Craziness? HELP?

Alright. My fiance and I are both Catholic. I went to a Catholic high school and a Catholic college and I attend mass every Sunday (at my college). I'm very religious, but I have never been confirmed, although I was baptized Catholic, and I was raised Catholic (by my grandmother, I wasn't confirmed because my mother does not think she belongs to the Catholic Church anymore since she got divorced). My fiance is also Catholic; he was baptized and confirmed, but he does not attend mass regularly (he works when I go, but I know he just finds it boring).





My fiance is getting deployed in July, and we are getting married in June. I would love to be married by a Catholic priest. However, I thought you couldn't be married by a priest unless you notified the priest 6 months in advance. But now I'm told that's only if you actually want to get married INSIDE the church. I'm having my wedding at a botanical garden. Can I still be married by a Catholic priest? Please help???

Catholic Wedding Craziness? HELP?
You probably ought to call the Church about this. I am betting they know their specific policies much better than anyone here in R%26amp;S.
Reply:You need to get married in a Catholic Church, by a Catholic priest or deacon, and you need to have the waiting period waived, due to your fiance's deployment.





Any number of local Catholic parishes should be able to work with you on that.





Please tell your mom that being divorced doesn't affect membership in the Cathoilc Church, although remarrying without an anullment typically prevents one from receiving the sacraments.
Reply:The 6 month rule sounds like a parish or diocesan rule and it has to do with completing pre-cana classes. Since your fiance is shipping out some Churches would probably make an exception.





As for getting married in the College Church. This is not uncommon and usually this is not excepted for any reason and often times has to do with a decision by the School.





Ask the pastor of your Church if he could recommend another pastor to you. He will help you I am sure.
Reply:MOST Christian ministers and priests do not like to perform a marriage ceremony unless the couple does some pre-marital counseling. Pre-marriage class. Because they want to feel like the marriage is right- and isn't going to end up in a divorce!!!!





That is why the waiting period. It IS a good idea too, because way too many people get married in haste and end up divorced.





But, honestly- if you must get married quickly- a marriage is a marriage in the eyes of God no matter WHO officiates- a judge or a priest or minister! So just find anyone who will officiate and it is fine.
Reply:There is far too much variation in church policies for anyone here to answer this - I speak as a wedding photographer who has worked at dozens of Catholic churches, each with different policies and restrictions depending on individual priests and even other clergy - deacons perform weddings in one of them.





Call the church itself, or several of them, to get accurate answers. But note that most priests will NOT perform ceremonies outside the church, period, though I'm sure there are exceptions made.
Reply:Talk to the Priest where you go at the college and ask him to recommend you to one that does marry people..


If he sends you to another Priest that will establish the fact that you do go to church, and give you credibility.. From there on you have to ask the new Priest what the rules are. Sounds like you need to hurry up..
Reply:unfortunately a priest won't marry you in a botanical garden to the best of my knowledge. my prayers will be with you both for your husbands safe return.


God speed


God bless


and thank you.
Reply:Talk to your priest he will be able to advise you call him tommow for an appointment to explain the situation! And he will be able to recommend another priest who can!
Reply:go to the base chaplin see if there is a catholic chaplin/priest there. He would/should do it.
Reply:In order to get married by a priest in a garden, rather than a church, you would have to get a dispensation from the Bishop. That being said, it almost never is given. One option would be to go ahead and get married and then have your marriage convalidated by a priest, which is a small separate ceremony in the Church which would make your marriage official, and well, validated by the Church. It too may require the 6 month period, which is not so much for the purposes of notification, but for pre-marital counseling. This can be shortened for certain individuals, but it is entirely up to the priest, and will be determined after he has met with you and your fiance. In other words, don't wait! Pick up the phone ASAP and get started since you're on a major time crunch.





Good luck and God Bless!
Reply:The fact you haven't received Confirmation won't be a problem so long as you make plans with your priest to receive said Sacrament as soon as possible, and make good on that promise obviously.





The fact your fiance doesn't attend weekly Mass is no good, no good at all. You make it sound as if he can't make it because he works (on weekends?). That be the case, he can always make good by attending a weekday Mass, once per week.





However, he's freely choosing not to do this because he things Mass is "boring". Weekly Mass attendance is a precept of the Church - meaning it is a requirement.





The main reason your fiance finds Mass boring, most likely, is because he does not understand the Mass. He's not going to acquire a better understanding of the Mass by blowing it off week after week. He has to start attending weekly Mass, with you or without you, whether he wants to, or not.








%26lt;%26lt;But now I'm told that's only if you actually want to get married INSIDE the church. I'm having my wedding at a botanical garden. Can I still be married by a Catholic priest? Please help???%26gt;%26gt;





The Sacrament of Holy Matrimony takes place inside a Catholic house of worship.





If the wedding "must" be elsewhere, you must obtain permission from the Bishop of the Diocese in which the wedding will be taking place. Mind you, permission is more apt to be granted if there is a reason the wedding MUST take place outside a Catholic house of worship.





However, it appears as if this is merely a matter of personal preference, not necessity. Don't expect to be granted permission. Still, it never hurts to ask. You might get lucky.








%26lt;%26lt;Also, the priest at the Church I normally attend doesn't do weddings. Its the college church, and, even though I've graduated, I still go there. But, because it's a college church, the priests there don't marry couples.%26gt;%26gt;





You need to become a member of a "regular" Catholic parish; where they can do weddings.